A Journey for the Truth: Part II

**The Phillip Harrelson mentioned in this post is from Lake Worth, FL. There is another Philip Harrelson (different spelling of the first name) who is a pentecostal pastor and resides in Dothan, AL.**

Scroll to the bottom of the post for update 08/2021

I don’t normally receive a tremendous amount of feedback on my blog posts in the way of comments. Typically my posts are shared on Twitter or Facebook and the dialogue takes place from there.

The post A Journey For the Truth definitely was an exception.

To date, there are over 100 comments on this post, mostly from those who expressed their support of Philip Harrelson, Pastor Scott Baugh & Journey Church, and Lake Worth Christian School, with no lack of criticism for Alex & Julie (including a horrible comment about their kids!). My writing skills were widely critiqued, as were my reporting standards. The amount of vitriol and ugliness that was written in the comments was shameful. From what I could surmise, these were from church-going people. This should not be.

In case you were wondering…this is a PERSONAL BLOG, and this is also a free country, where we have freedom of speech. People are free to tell their stories, using any medium they choose. For those who have been traumatized by situations like this, healing can begin when the truth is told. Secrets make you sick.

 

SINCE THE LAST POST

Phillip Harrelson did not lose his job at Lake Worth Christian School as a result of what was exposed in the blog post. I have heard that the board of LWCS met and decided to keep him on staff as the campus pastor, despite the fact that he violated the school’s morality standards and singlehandedly flung a wrecking ball through two schools, Journey Church and many families..

The former worship pastor at Journey Church who was quietly let go and moved on – is still on staff as a campus pastor. I emailed senior pastor Jason Britt at Bethlehem Church in Bethlehem, GA on January 4, 202o to inform him of the clergy sexual abuse committed by Oconee Campus Pastor Jeremy Curtis while he was employed at Journey Church. He responded on January 8, 202o thanking me for the email and & information. That was it.

I really don’t know what it takes to disqualify pastors these days.

 

NOW ON TO PART II

The Saturday Morning Comment

After reading this comment, I immediately reached out to Alex & Julie. They asked if I would contact Pastor Doug to confirm this information, which I was happy to do. Pastor Doug Holmes and I were able to have a phone conversation in February, where he related to me what happened with Phillip and the circumstances regarding his departure from Christian Life Church.

Christian Life Church, Milton, Florida

Pastor Doug has served as senior pastor Christian Life Church in Milton, FL since 1984. Back in the early 2000’s, upon the recommendation of Pastor Steve Wood at First Baptist Church of Milton, FL (Phillip’s youth pastor), Pastor Doug hired Phillip Harrelson as the youth pastor for Christian Life Church. Phillip was a native of Milton, FL and a local ‘football star’, having played high school football, then college football for Liberty University.

While Phillip came highly recommended by Steve Wood, Pastor Doug ignored his instinct to follow up with a previous church that Phillip left in the Kansas City area. A decision that he now regrets.

Initially, Pastor Doug said, Phillip was a great addition to the staff and worked well with the youth department. Youth group attendance grew and the kids loved him. He had a great personality and was always coming up with new and exciting activities. Over time, however, the draw of students began to wane. The activities that once brought in crowds of youth were not enough to sustain long-term discipleship. Attendance began to drop.  Concerns were also being raised, since an administrative staff member had seen Phillip alone with a married female student leader at the church one day, when the church was supposed to be closed.

The Confession

In 2002, Phillip ultimately confessed to having a romantic relationship with this married youth volunteer and that it had been building for months. After an unsuccessful probationary period, his position was terminated. Christian Life Church members received a letter with a simple explanation. The church had also received a very large donation for the youth department from this married female student leader, which they decided to return to her after learning of the inappropriate relationship (abuse).

Googling

Pastor Doug related to me that he had a habit of ‘googling’ Philip Harrelson about once a year. For some reason he waited a little bit longer this time and didn’t ‘Google’ Phillip for about a year & 1/2 –  and the first thing he saw on that January morning in 202o was my blog post about Phillip. His heart sank.

He immediately responded to the blog with his comment, almost without thinking. In hindsight he was unsure if he should have done it. Now he’s glad, mostly for Alex & Julie to know that this really had happened before. He wants people to know that Phillip has clearly exhibited a pattern of abuse, and by telling the story of what happened at his church, it will hopefully prevent further abuse from happening. I commend Pastor Doug for speaking out and sharing. It took tremendous courage and I thank God for pastors like him, who value the truth above all else. He is a pastor worthy of double-honor (I Tim. 5;17), who faithfully looks after his flock. Well done, Pastor Doug, well done.

The Go-Between

Sometimes an abuser will enlist the help of a person or persons to help them carry out their abuse. For anyone who is familiar with narcissists, those people would be called ‘flying monkeys’ – designated people who are singled out to do the bidding of the narcissist. People who are themselves vulnerable in some way, who become enmeshed in the twisted dynamics of the abuser, oftentimes unbeknownst to this person. In the case of Phillip and *Cheryl, that person was Melissa.

I was put in touch with Melissa not long after the first post was published. She told me she wanted to help with this second post, especially since she was so close to the situation.

Melissa worked with *Cheryl and Phillip at OCS from 2015-2016, and with *Cheryl from 2016-2017. (Phillip began working at LWCS in the fall of 2016) She had firsthand knowledge of what went on, which, spanned the course of several years. She said that many of the other staff at OCS were keenly aware that something was off, and had been for a very long time. While at the time she believed what happened with Phillip & *Cheryl was a consensual affair, Melissa now understands that what happened was clergy abuse.

Melissa has provided me with documentation of Phillip’s continued attempts to maintain contact with *Cheryl after the inappropriate relationship (abuse) was exposed. When the inappropriate relationship was revealed in July 0f 2018, Melissa was one of the first people to find out.

In Aug 2018 Phillip became aware that Melissa knew, and then he used Melissa because he needed a way to communicate without his wife (whom he affectionately referred to as ‘The Warden‘) being able to track it. Phillip used his work phone at Lake Worth Christian School to maintain contact with Melissa, and by extension, *Cheryl. Not only was Melissa communicating with Phillip, but at the same time she was also being bombarded with text messages from Phillip’s wife. She was completely in the middle of this horrible mess. In the fall of 2018, Phillip & Melissa spoke at a minimum 3-4 times per week. He had also asked Melissa to make a promise to ‘keep *Cheryl safe‘, and in September 2018, he gave Melissa a $100 gift card, so that she could take *Cheryl out for a nice dinner. Melissa also learned that a pact had been made between Phillip & *Cheryl – that if they were caught, *Cheryl had agreed to take the blame. (what a stand-up guy!)

 

TEXT & EMAILS

In this screen shot of an email from Phillip to Melissa, he is showing her a tattoo that he had gotten, and then later asked her to take *Cheryl to his tattoo artist so that they could get similar tattoos…as a sign of solidarity. Melissa & *Cheryl never did get the tattoos.

 

 

 

In December 2018 (5 months after the inappropriate relationship was discovered), Phillip sent this text message to *Cheryl and copied Melissa on it:

 

The Interview

By the fall of 2018, Melissa was fed up with being used by Phillip as a go-between and she cut off contact with him. The ongoing texts continued between Melissa and Phillip’s wife. She bombarded Melissa with pictures of her and Phillip, hoping that she would show *Cheryl how happy they were.

In April 2019 Phillip reached out to Melissa once again, to present her with an amazing opportunity – a new position at Lake Worth Christian School. Phillip told her he would meet with the headmaster, then take her class to class to show her what the current teacher was doing. Melissa even received a call from Phillip’s wife to follow-up on the upcoming interview – and asked Melissa NOT to mention *Cheryl.

The day of the interview, Melissa showed up, prepared to meet with the headmaster and tour the classes. None of that happened. Phillip started off with some small talk, then spent the next 2 hours of the ‘interview’ asking about *Cheryl. It was not an interview – there was no job. It was an interrogation and Melissa had been used once again. Phillip Harrelson continued a pattern of lies and cover-up for at least a year after his misconduct was discovered. 

Phillip ALSO used his position and resources at Lake Worth Christian School to continue pursuing a woman other than his wife.

Another Pastor Fail

In June 2019, former Journey Church pastor Matt Tumas reached out to Melissa, having heard of her involvement in the Phillip/*Cheryl situation from another church member. According to Melissa, “in my eyes he was the pastor who walked the walk and talked the talk.” She told him EVERYTHING and Matt confessed that he had known for years about Phillip & *Cheryl’s attraction, and he had even questioned Phillip years before when they worked together at Journey Church and OCS. Something that stood out as odd to me in Pastor Matt’s assessment was that he told Melissa that he could see how much Phillip & *Cheryl were alike, and how Pastor Scott could see it too. He also said he could see how their spouses were not suited for them. 

Side Note

It is deeply concerning to me that two pastors came to similar conclusions regarding the inappropriate conduct of a fellow pastor. Instead of identifying the abusive behavior as ABUSE, or at the very LEAST – adulterous behavior – their assessments were that Phillip & *Cheryl were just badly matched up with their current spouses. Pastor Scott Baugh & Pastor Matt Tumas expressed empathy for Phillip and had understanding for ‘why’ he would stray from his wife. Are these truly godly men? I think not. No pastor with a shred of character & biblical knowledge would excuse this behavior in any form on any grounds. This makes me question their standards of morality. What secrets could they be hiding or willing to hide?

Pastor Matt sympathized with Melissa’s predicament and even offered to broker a meeting between Phillip, *Cheryl and their spouses in an effort to ‘put it all out on the table’. Melissa agreed and felt a weight had been lifted. She wanted everything out in the open. He assured her that he would arrange this meeting at the end of the summer (2019),  but the meeting never happened. Melissa wrote, “He lied too. He’s part of the cover-up.”

 

CASUALTIES IN THE CHURCH

What stood out to me in my email exchange with Melissa was what she wrote here:

“He (Phillip) had been using me too all these years. I was the key to them being able to go away on races and get away from their spouses. Made me angry, question what I knew about the church.”

What is also questionable is the sale of the Harrelson’s home in 2018, which oddly enough was purchased by *Cheryl & her husband, a few months before the inappropriate relationship was exposed. I was told that Phillip Harrelson had wanted to live in a more desirable neighborhood, which required, of course, to sell their current home at top dollar. Could Phillip have had improper influence in this matter, seeing as he was credibly accused of financial abuse of another woman at his previous church?

I have received emails from people who knew about the misconduct concerning Phillip Harrelson and other cover-ups at Journey Church. It makes me wonder how many other casualties there are as a result of the lies, abuse and cover-ups that have been allowed to go on unchecked.

The Final Takeaway

I recently read the book ‘When Narcissism Comes to Church‘ by Chuck DeGroat. This is a book that I would highly recommend. It is not a light read. There are some disturbing and eye-opening concepts in the book that are worth applying to this situation. 

So why do men like Phillip Harrelson seem to get away with the unthinkable & remain in ministry?

In his book, Chuck DeGroat writes,

“Too often narcissistic pastors are rewarded for their CHARISMA. Congregants do not always have categories for what they perceive from the outside to be occasional inconsistencies, frustrating drama, troubling rumors, or arrogant behaviors. They’ll forgive these things for powerful sermons, persistent success, and perceived authority. They will often defer to the narcissist’s spiritual persona rather than their true character. And because narcissistic leaders appear so confident and certain, they tend to BE BELIEVED.”1

This is what allows the James McDonald’s, Mark Driscoll’s, Matt Chandler’s, Tullian Tchividjian’s, Andy Savage’s & Wes Feltner’s of the evangelical world to continue on with their platforms – people value charisma, talent & success over character – EVERY SINGLE TIME. It is the worst kind of cognitive dissonance and a clear suspension of critical thinking skills. Faced with irrefutable evidence of wrongdoing by the pastor or spiritual leader, the mass of supporters refuse to see the truth, and instead choose to attack the victims – the ones exposing the abuse. These are the same people that I suspect would mow right over a restaurant waiter for messing up their order, but will let Pastor X get away with pretty much anything short of murder. 

I don’t know if Phillip Harrelson is a narcissist or not, but in my opinion, his past & current behaviors certainly fall on the higher end of the narcissistic spectrum. This insight from ‘When Narcissism Comes to Church‘ certainly points to a cycle that Phillip Harrelson appears to engage in,

“Narcissistic leaders experience a victim-martyr-hero identity that postures them as the inevitable targets of frustrated subordinates. Their persecution complex actually enhances their status among some who view them as a hero for standing tall amid the battle. The system comes to the rescue of the leader at the expense of his victims.” 2

Another interesting point that stands out to me is that Phillip Harrelson did not enter into a physically (sexual) abusive relationship with either woman. Why? I believe it was another facet of control, which almost all abuse is rooted in. It’s pathological. By not ‘crossing that line’ physically, he believes he can maintain control of his life & career. He is able to say that he didn’t ‘technically’ cheat (abuse). Of course this is not true. He did cross MANY boundaries inappropriately and what he did with these two women WAS sexual abuse. Any sexualization of the relationship – comments about appearance, sexual innuendo, sexual advances, language, declarations of love and adoration – all of that is clergy sexual abuse when a pastor pursues a woman in the church or a woman under his authority in any way.

(I would like to meet a wife who wouldn’t consider what Phillip engaged in as ‘cheating’…)

 

 

JUDGED MORE STRICTLY

I Timothy 3:1-7 provides us with the guidelines & requirements for pastors/elders:

“This is a trustworthy saying: If anyone aspires to be an overseer, he desires a noble task.  An overseer, then, must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not dependent on wine, not violent but gentle, peaceable, and free of the love of money. An overseer must manage his own household well and keep his children under control, with complete dignity. For if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how can he care for the church of God? He must not be a recent convert, or he may become conceited and fall under the same condemnation as the devil. Furthermore, he must have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the snare of the devil.”

 

Those who seek careers in ministry are subject to harsher judgment. They aren’t ‘just like the rest of us‘. They MUST maintain a higher standard, and when they don’t, they are disqualified from ministry.

“Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly.” James 3:1

 

When pastors fall, they are to be openly rebuked, AS A WARNING to others. Since Phillip’s local church & the school (where he is the campus pastor) have failed to follow this biblical mandate, they have brought shame on the church. Now the church at large must bring the rebuke.

“But those elders who are sinning you are to reprove before everyone, so that the others may take warning.”   I Timothy 5:20

Observations

I am grieved over the debris path that Phillip Harrelson’s clergy abuse has left behind in at least two churches and two Christian schools (that we know of). He has hurt many people. He also has no shortage of supporters (enablers) which in many situations like these, include the spouse. The dutiful, faithful spouse who stands by the pastor with a smile, absorbing some (if not all) of the blame for his wandering eye. I feel a special sadness for her – the wife. Somewhere along the way she made a choice to tolerate the intolerable and create a space for her husband where true accountability does not exist. The focus shifts from godly repentance to maintaining a public image. Sadly in some cases, pressure from family members such as parents & siblings will cause a wife to tolerate this intolerable behavior, or even excuse it. I can’t imagine.

 

IN CLOSING

Everyone who is close to this situation – whether it is a member or attender of Journey Church or a parent of a Lake Worth Christian School student – you are accountable for what you now know. If you are reading this post – you are now accountable for knowing the truth about Phillip Harrelson and you have to decide what to do with that information. What has been presented is not rumors or conjecture. It is proof.

You must decide.

 

  1. Degroat, Chuck, ‘When Narcissism Comes to Church.’ 2020, PG. 22.
  2. DeGroat, Chuck, ‘When Narcissism Comes to Church.’ 2020, PG. 85.

SO WHOEVER KNOWS THE RIGHT THING TO DO AND FAILS TO DO IT, FOR HIM IT IS SIN.

JAMES 4:17

**UPDATE 08/2021

 

Phillip Harrelson is no longer the Campus Pastor at Lake Worth Christian School, and as far as I know, is not involved in professional ministry. Let’s hope these posts will serve as a warning if Philip tries to reenter ministry at a future date.

 

A comment was left on the first post of this series, A Journey For the Truth, that I felt needed more attention.

There are a great deal of people who are carrying around wounds from churches like this. Only when someone brave comes forward to speak about their experience, does it give a place for other victims to share what happened to them. I suspect there are many more ‘walking wounded’ that have resulted from abuse and mistreatment at Journey Church. I will gladly write their stories if they are willing.

20 Comments
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Just stop
Just stop
4 years ago

Do I believe that what happened was right? No. Do I believe that it’s our job to judge anyone, place blame, or involve ourselves at all? – emphatically no. Only the Lord can do that. You are being so hypocritical about this whole thing. These people hurt others but you are just trying to do the same thing by so called ‘exposing the truth’ when everyone already knows the truth, you are just trying to stir the pot. Nothing happened the first time you tried to ruin people’s lives with your blog post..just give it up. This isn’t your battle… Read more »

Start with Truth
4 years ago

Your Quote: “I really don’t know what it takes to disqualify pastors these days.” Let’s start with facts and the truth. You provided one piece of physical evidence and it is poorly edited. Perhaps, to protect Melissa. But between both blogs you make 32 accusations, with zero physical evidence. What Alex and Julie are saying needs some factual evidence before you attack families, children and your brothers/sisters in Christ. Yes. Expose the abusers. BUT do it with TRUTH. Your “readers” are not mad because you are exposing an abuser. They are mad because you attempt it without little regard for… Read more »

Start with Truth
3 years ago
Reply to  Author

If there is “ample evidence” of Phillips behavior, produce it.

And please do not twist my words. Asking for evidence is not defending Phillip, it is defending truth. Truth is more important.

“You don’t need actual evidence. Just take my word for it.” You sound just like my abuser.

melissa
melissa
4 years ago

I will provide you with any evidence you would like, unedited:)))

Interested
Interested
4 years ago
Reply to  melissa

Please do!

Also Interested
Also Interested
3 years ago
Reply to  melissa

why is the time edited??? Can you explain what is covered up???

grace
grace
4 years ago

What timelines don’t add up? What accusations don’t add up? This went on for years – after they were confronted and lied, and even still after they were finally caught. I don’t see how you could possibly say that it doesn’t ddd up.

Start with Truth
3 years ago
Reply to  grace

Good question. The timelines of the complete story., not just this individual post. For example, Phillip was caught months AFTER he left the Journey staff, yet Journey is somehow responsible for a coverup? How can they be held responsible for that? We are all now supposed to responsible for the “emotions” of others that COULD possibly happen in the future? That is just plain crazy. Then again crazy thrives on this blog.

Other the other hand, LWC did have access to the actual affair. That is on them.

Former Journey Member
Former Journey Member
4 years ago

I just can’t even fathom why anyone would still be defending the Baughs, Matt Tumas, Phillip, or even *Cheryl. She may be a victim of clergy abuse, but at some point she needs to be an adult responsible for her decisions.

Someone not passing judgement.
Someone not passing judgement.
4 years ago

Cheryl actually has taken responsibility. That’s the harm in only seeing and hearing portions of people’s viewpoints. That’s the harm in these blogs. We are all just hearing observations from those who were an extension part of the situation. These blogs are doing more harm than good in every way possible. I, for one, know that Cheryl has never passed blame or made any accusations, she has repented, and is trying to move on. Can we just bury what happened almost 2 years ago and now go forward? What happened to “Let any one of you who is without sin… Read more »

Melissa
Melissa
4 years ago

But this isnt about her. It’s about the Pastors, leaders at the christian school, and Phillip’s predatory path. She has apologized, multiple times. She takes responsibility for her part. This is about what lengths Phillip, Holly, Scott, Matt, and others involved are willing to go to cover, hide, and protect themselves while walking over anyone in their path.

Lauren
Lauren
4 years ago

If you want to blame someone for “these blogs” blame the pastors that protected their own interests instead of their flock. It’s a travesty indeed when the shepherds are feeding on their flock Instead of protecting them. (see Ezekiel 34) Phillip has shown a pattern. His first pastor Doug Holmes at least had the integrity and care any true shepherd would. He chose to protect his flock and dismiss Phillip for his abuse and for betraying his office. Sad that more pastors don’t have that same dedication to their calling as Doug Holmes.. Phillip claimed he was “repentant” yet continued… Read more »

Former Journey Member
Former Journey Member
3 years ago

I guess I’m having trouble with this as a teacher myself. If I worked in a Christian school and were to have an affair, physical or not, with a married man, I would most certainly lose my job. The fact that he was a pastor should not change this.

Big Fan!
Big Fan!
4 years ago

WOW. This is sensational. To be honest… I can’t wait for the next installment! Will Journey finally be burnt at the stake? Will God smite Phillip? Will we EVER learn Cheryl’s real name? Will Melissa finally get sick of putting herself smack-dab in the middle of the drama? I can’t wait to see who Lifetime casts once they get the film rights! More importantly, I hope you win a Pulitzer Prize for your top-notch analysis of situations that don’t concern you and your almost-grasp of the English language!